Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Shutting Down

I find myself lately shutting down. Don't get me wrong, I am still hopeful, still honest about my journey and still faithful that God has a huge special plan in store for my husband and I. However, I catch myself getting sad over things and when someone asks me whats wrong I simply say 'oh nothing'...I used to open up to them and tell them what I was sad over.

I think after 4 1/2 years it's just getting old...I'm shutting down, not reaching out as much as I used to.

Again, don't get me wrong-I am so grateful for this journey and for the person it has molded me into, but at times I catch myself wondering when this journey will be over...and I think thats just normal...


(For all of those who have asked my appt with my Dr. regarding my ovaries will be the week of the 29th)

Thank you everyone for the kind thoughts and prayers, it really does help :)

13 comments:

Lauren said...

Oh, Tiffany, just remember when you are shutting down, God is there to lift you up!!! We love you!!!

noahandlylasmommi said...

Praying for you girl. I cant imagine your pain. Just know that God sees it and he is weeping with you. I am thinking of you and praying for a big step forward after your Dr's appt.

Suzy said...

theres a fertility center in dallas opening up and they are giving away a free IVF cycle to a lucky winner. they are having a free seminar sometime in september. their website is embryo.net . no i dont work for em, just heard em on the radio today and thought of u (ive been a lurker for yrs now :P)

Jennifer said...

I definitely think that what you're thinking and feeling is normal. I'm praying for you and your husband.

Kristin said...

I love that God knows what we need even when we are just so tired that we don't have the energy to ask anymore. I pray for you often, Tiffany!

Summer {Bisfor...} said...

always praying for you, my love. always.

Jess said...

It IS normal to wonder when it will be over. We all do it. I think a reason we don't spill all to people when they ask how we are or what's up is because we know they cannot fix the situation we are in. They can offer advice or a hug, but not a solve-all solution. Only God creates the solution for us.

Rosie said...

Ditto on what Lauren said. And also just want to remind yout hat it's ok to not tell everyone your business all the time. Sometimes, you need to keep things to yourself. Esp when you don't have the energy to talk about it. Happens to everyone. Love you friend!

Katy said...

I'm right there with ya girl! Praying for you!

Ashley said...

It has been only a year since we started trying and I have moments like that already! At times I will tell the details to my friends and famalies and then other times I just feel like keeping that topic between me and my hubby! I do better talking to him or other people going through infertility b/c they know where I am coming from. Keep posting even when you feel like shutting down. I know it will help!!! I always read your blog and somehow can always relate to whatever you are feeling. Hang in there and I will be praying for you....esp. on the 29th!!!

* ButterflyChik* said...

Hey Hey,
I stumbled over your blog today and I just had to tell you I'm enjoying your blog. Your awesome. I became a follower and I'm looking forward to keeping up and leaving comments. I hope you will check out my blog, and become a follower. I have a button, and I'd like to add you to my blog roll. I hope you have a lovely weekend. God Bless You and Yours and Hang in there. I understand what you are going through, I'm there myself.

http://diaryofhappilyeverafter.blogspot.com/

Love,
Jess

Hoping for our own Peanut said...

I wish I knew what I could say to lift your spirits. I understand what youre going through..to an extent. Your road has been much longer than mine, but I know theres a reason for it. Trust that your day will come, I promise it will. :)

twondra said...

Awww, sweetie, I've felt the same. It's so hard sometimes. I'm ALWAYS here for you. (((HUGS)))


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