Wednesday, September 3, 2008

You know you're trying to conceive when.....

((Keep in mind these are all MOSTLY TRUE haha!!!))

Women:

*You think you might wet your pants every morning because you can't go to the bathroom until your thermometer beeps.
*Your calendar at work is color coded for the days leading up to ovulation.
*You tell people you work for the FBI because they look at you funny when you use jargon like BBT, TTC, and AF.
*Anyone else would need a decoder to read your fertility chart.
*Suddenly, everyone around you is either pregnant, nursing or with a child
*You've created voodoo dolls for all of the people who've asked, "Are you pregnant yet?"

Men:

*You open your briefcase and find a sticky note from your wife that says, "Don't drink any coffee, no cocktails after work, don't stress out and keep your 'boys' cool."
*You're sleeping in front of the fireplace and showering at the gym because your wife turned down the water heater at home and took away your electric blanket.
*You look like someone out of a rap video because your new boxers keep riding up and out of the top of your pants.
*You feel like your wife has an alarm clock in her shorts because every four weeks or so, she comes running out of the bathroom saying, "Drop your pants--it's time!"
*Someone asks you what day it is and you reply, "Cycle day 20."
*You know enough about the workings of the female body to teach a health class at the high school.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I saw this poem (that doesn't rhyme haha), and thought it VERY true!!!

Anything, Yes….I said I will do anything ...

Temperature charts, Ovulation test, blood test to count progesterone…Abstinence to maxize sperm count, laying on my back with a pillow under my rear-end and my legs up like a beetle….Vitamin A…Vitamin E, Zinc, Manganese, Omega 3…I could run My own drug store….Anything I said…yes anything, that’s what I would do so I could have a baby But please….OH PLEASE…don’t ask me to “just relax”.

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3 comments:

Shelly said...

haha those are too funny! u poor guys! i just wish this process could be OVER for u and u could be pg!! but its nice to see that u have a sense of humor about it still! lots of luck & baby dust!

Melody said...

GIRL, it's going to be ALL GOOD. I feel bad for you that it's taking so long but im' SO glad you are on your way! It's GOING to happen! I KNOW it!

Ape and Brett said...

Those are pretty amusing, but I know they aren't very funny to ya'll because well yall are doing those things! I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE HOW THIS CYCLE GOES!! Just dont create a voo doo doll of me!! haha I ♥ you


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