Thursday, April 23, 2009

We have hit a MAJOR Pothole in the Road!


I'm not quite sure where to start....so let me start by introducing you to my mom....

My Lovely Bloggers.....

<~~~This beautiful lady (ok...the other, beautiful lady ha!) is my mom!

Sometimes it helps when you have a face to go with who you are praying for. {Plus I wasn't quite sure how to lead into this difficult post, so that seemed like the easiest way possible.....}


OK....as you all my mom had her angiogram last week, her MRI this week and got the results today...these results weren't exactly "how" we expected they would be...however like my post below God doesn't always lead us down the "easy" roads...we have most def. stepped in a major pothole!!

*For starters...she is suspected to have a ruptured inner ear, this would be the main cause as to why she always falls and can not keep her balance. She will be seeing a specialist for this within the next couple weeks.

*She has 8 bludging and ruptured disks in her back. Her Dr. pretty much said she is walking around with a "broken back"...from the top to the bottom it's pretty bad and surgery wise, he just doesn't know if it's fixable without causing more damage than good. Her Dr. has pain Dr's that work under him and she will start to see them and discuss the options of injections (which she already receives, and they don't help her to much), infusions and implants (the implant would be a little box they would put in her back to release pain meds so that she can function.)

*OK...now here comes the hard part! Her brain aneurysm and brain tumor...both are on her left side of the brain. He said he will bring her back in 4 months to do another angiogram and "if" they have grown any, she will undergo immediate surgery (like the same day or next day)

So are you thinking what I was thinking????? "Why not just do it now and get it over with???"

He said if she was healthy he would do the surgery now, however my mom is far from healthy. Since she has already had a brain aneurysm it would only do more harm than good. He is afraid doing surgery now with everything that is wrong it could very possibly leave her brain dead. The surgery is so very risky, and he said right now it's not an option that he wants to do. However; he can not promise that she will be here in 4 months to do the angiogram. A brain aneurysm is serious and you never know what will happen. She could make it years without any growth or any bursting, or she could only have days. One of the main reasons he can't do the back surgery is; #1 it's a very serious surgery in itself, however the stress of the theraphy that she would be enduring after the surgery is far to stressful and painful than her brain needs right now. Her Dr. advised her, NO stress, NO tears, NO getting angry, NO getting sad...absolutely nothing that would trigger her aneurysm to burst. He said at no time is she to forget that she has a brain aneurysm and brain tumor. He does not want her to walk on egg shells through life, HOWEVER this is something she always needs to be aware of, because ANY sign of ANYthing she feels different or if she has a bad headache...anything that isnt "day to day" normal she is to call him ASAP , as that could very possibly save her life.

Personally I'm very numb at the moment (besides my pounding head and swollen eyes from crying). I honestly can't believe it's like this. She had her other aneurysm and it was "ok lets do surgery, wham bam thank you mam', it's all fixed"...(ok, so it was a little more scary than just that....but my point is it was FIXED)...however I don't have that option right now. I could hear her fighting back tears telling me this dreadful news. We both hoped for the same news "I can fix this and I will" we didn't expect for this to be so "difficult". I could hear the fear in her voice when she leads to tell me how she doesn't ever want to be brain dead and how if she ever became that way that she would want me to pull the plug...I immediately stopped her and said thats not an option and I didn't want to talk about that--I can't think about that! That is NOT an option!!!!! Inside though, I am terrified that my mom will fall or get upset and trigger her aneurysm to burst. I sat on the phone while she was telling me this and held my composer. I said, "it's ok mom...we will get through this, no biggie at all...have Faith"....then I hung up the phone and bawled like a big baby; thats my mom...nothing can happen to her.

I don't know what the next few months will hold, I don't know how this will all play out. I personally wish I would wake up from this nightmare. I just keep telling myself, GOD HAS A PLAN! I think I have prayed since the moment I talked to my mom...I would be lying if I said I wasn't scared now, b/c I am beyond scared...however God is amazing and he will guide us through this, some how...some way...we will make it through this. God doesn't give you any more than you can handle, although at times (def. right now!) I wish I could seriously have a one on one with Him and please ask him how much more does he possible think I can handle, b/c I personally think I have enough on my plate...BUT if he knows I can handle it, I guess I can...

SO the plan! My mom goes back in 4 months if not before!!

We need to pray for 2 major things:
1) for the aneurysm to NOT burst
and 2) for the aneurysm and tumor to NOT grow

Also, please pray that she stays calm...somehow, someway, she can not stress!! I also need strength, I've become a pretty tough chick throughout this infertility journey, however bumps like these make me feel extremely weak! I have to be able to remain strong for her to remain calm!

PLEASE keep her in your prayers!!

Thank you and God Bless!

33 comments:

gemlc said...

Hi Tiffany~ I have been following your blog about your mom and I just want you to now that you are inmy thoughts. A few weeks back my mom was in the hospital for a blood transfusion and then a surgery, it was very scary. after that, I have never admired my mom so much like that day. I hope mom will be ok, just take it day by day. Take care and ttyl, xxxxxxx

Penny1215 said...

Bless your family!! I'm praying for you!!

Amy said...

Oh Tiff, I am so very sorry to hear this news, and my heart literally breaks for both you and your mom. You know you are all in my prayers. We've just got to pray much harder. I pray God gives her strength to get through this.

You look just like your mom...2 beautiful women. I love you dear!

Ashley said...

I wish I knew the words to make you feel better!! Since I don't....I want you to know that you are definately in my prayers!! God will lead yall through this tough time!! ((HUGS))

Kelli said...

Praying for you and your beautiful mother! God is in control, He always is!

Ape said...

hey sweetie i just read your blog. I want you to know that it is okay to be scared, confused, nervous, upset, mad, sad, and any other emotions you want to feel. ITS OKAY! You can feel these things and sometimes its best if you just let your feelings out. Your mom is a VERY tough woman and I KNOW she can get through this. I KNOW she can pull through, I KNOW she will do anything and everything in hre power to STAY HERE WITH YOU. She LOVES you more than lift itself Tiff and somedays I think YOU are what keeps her going. You be strong for her and you keep telling her to have that FAITH. Sometimes its all we have left. God will never ever put you through something we can't get through. Lean on him, rely on him, and most importantly talk to him, he is ALWAYS listening. I love you very much and I love your mom very much as well. Im praying for you and her. You call me if you need ANYTHING. Im 2 seconds away.

Following Him said...

Praying for your sweet mother as she faces this major pot hole in front of her.
~Elyse~

Shannon said...

Thank you for your sweet comment on my blog. I just got caught up on your story and your moms and you are definitely in my prayers. Praying right now for your family.

twondra said...

Oh my gosh! I have tears in my eyes. I'm sooooo sorry sweetie. I will definitely be praying for you and your family. ((((HUGS))) Love you sweetie

Jess said...

I also wanted to thank you for your very sweet comment on my blog as well!! I'm so very sorry about what you and your mom are going though! You both are beautiful and will be in my thoughts and prayers!!!
((HUGS!))

Veronica said...

Tiffany,

My heart is hurting for you right now, but I want you to know that I am praying for you guys. We serve a big God...one that promised us that he would never leave us or forsake us. We have no other option but to trust in Him!!!

Love ya,
V

Stephanie said...

Hon...I'm praying for you and your mom! What an amazing lady she is!!!!!!

rachelbk said...

Hi Tiffany, thanks for stopping by my blog.
You and your mom are in my thoughts and prayers. I hope that things take a turn for the better for all of you.

Mrz. Hannah Myhre said...

Praying for your mom.. God is in control and he is with you.. even when you feel that you can't take it anymore.. He is always there!!

Hugs,
Hannah

Jenn said...

I'm so sorry to hear this news. I am praying for your mom and for you.

Ashley said...

Tiff-

Hey, sweetie! Just know that I am always here for you and I am praying SO hard for you and your mom! It totally breaks my heart that this is happening. I said a prayer as soon as I got off of the phone earlier and James told me to tell you he was sorry too! Have keep your faith and stay strong for your momma! I can tell from the one time I have met your mom, that she is a strong woman. I love you girl =)

P.S.- I cancelled the boxing match in my backyard tonight!!! Hahahahaha!

Ashley said...

** I meant to just put-Keep your faith, not Have Keep! Opps.

Joy said...

I know what it is like when your mom is sick and you don't know what's going to happen to her day-to-day. I wish I had some words of wisdom. Everything I could say seems so trite, "Be strong." "Keep your chin up."

So I will just tell you that we're praying and praying for your mom! I will add her to our prayer chain at church, too.

One Nurse said...

I am so sorry! All of this is some pretty scary stuff. We will certainly be praying for all of you and for the wisdom of her medical team that they are doing all they can. We will pray that they will find a way, to give her the best life possible.
I will keep following your blog and your mom's progress. Hang in there and know there are alot of people out here praying! God works ALL things out!!

One Nurse said...

I know I just left a comment but as soon as I closed the window, this is what came to my mind and I felt I needed to share it with you. . .

2 Timothy 1:7 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

God Bless!!!

Nichole said...

Prayers are definitely coming your way my friend! I am so sorry you are having to endure this -

God Bless You!

Shelly said...

aw girl im sorry to hear the bad news. life sucks sometimes but just know that God is with you and like u said-he will get u all thru this. my grandpa had a stomach anurism and WOULD NOT go to the doc. . unfortunatley he died from it bc he didnt get help in time. so hopefully since ur mom has help early on, they can get it under control. i know she will be fighting for herself & you..but i tink she will also be fighting to one day see her future grandbaby! keep ur spirits up. let me know if u need anything at all!

ShannonLeideker said...

You poor thing! I am so sorry for all that you are going through. I am praying hard for your family!

Melody said...

You are in my prayers. I have a list on my computer of people I am praying for! She will be added right now!

Amber Schmidt said...

Prayers and hugs sent from Kentucky!

Crystal said...

Oh my goodness girl! I'm speechless and so heartbroken for you. My prayers continue. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you. Stay strong!!

Lori said...

My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family. I will keep your mom in our prayers. I cannot imagine how you must feel. Know that the Lord cares for you and he will get you through this!!

Living With Loss said...

I am so sorry.

You and your mum are in my thoughts.

~the mccrarys~ said...

i feel so outta the loop! i just looked at your blog yesterday & no news of your mom & then today i just caught up on everything! wow-it really got me when you said your mom may not make it to 4 months & just how unpredictable these anurisms (sp?) are...thats very scary! i will def be thinkin of her & hoping she gets through this but also thinking of YOU & hoping you can get through everything on your plate right now. wish i could give ya a hug but for now all i can offer is words. if ya need to talk, you know how to reach me!

mer@lifeat7000feet said...

I'm so sorry about your mom, Tiffany. My dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer last fall and I understand your overwhelmedness right now.

There are good days and bad days, but I'm thankful that Jesus is Lord over them all. May He calm your restless and hurting heart and surround you with His peace.

Praying...

dreambaby said...

Aw Sweety, I'm so sorry things are so tough. I think Satan tries to attack those who are closer to God Much More! If he can bring you to your knees, you'll turn away from God right? NO! I talk to God about everything too, even when I just want a "hug" from Him. I'm including your mom in my prayers!

Megan said...

OMGOSH Tiffany! I'm SO sorry I'm just now seeing this! How insanely scary! Your mom and your family will certainly remain in my prayers! I hope they're able to eventually fix this without brain damage! Wow. I'm so sorry! (((HUGE HUGS))) and TONS of prayers headed your way!!!

Jennie said...

Sitting at work crying for you. I will definitely have your mom and your entire family in my prayers. Try and stay positive and spend as much time with your mom as you can!! Keep us updated, sweetie!


The Pifer Family
<div class="grab-button" margin: 0 auto;"> <a href="http://thepiferfamily.blogspot.com/" rel="nofollow"> <img src="http://i909.photobucket.com/albums/ac293/munchkin_land_designs/PiferFamiliy/PiferFamilyNewButton1.png" alt="The Pifer Family"> </a> </div>

Designed by:

Munchkin Land Designs
 
Designed by Munchkin Land Designs • Copyright 2013 • All Rights Reserved