Friday, March 4, 2011

Life without Blogs?

What would I do without Y'ALL?!

I mean that!

There aren't many friends that I can talk to when I get emotional, not everyone understands...

But it never fails, no matter how discombobulated I think my post may seem, someone that reads it 'gets me'!

Means alot! A WHOLE LOT!

Sometimes I feel alone, by myself...tired of explaining our story, tired of explaining why I'm sad, mad, upset or frustrated...I start a post and end it thinking 'no one will even understand this blob of rambling' But y'all do!

I'm so thankful for technology, so thankful for my blogger friends, so thankful for the emails I get daily, I've been sent so many books on infertility from y'all, articles, cards...It's amazing to know people understand and care!

I have maybe a handful of friends in real life that understand, I wouldn't even say my whole family understands everything...some try! My grandma goes to the library and reads my blog and researches whats new with us, my mom writes everything down in a journal so she doesn't forget with her short termed memory...but some act as though they could care less (or maybe thats just how I feel!)

After so long it's easy to feel forgotten...you see your family get giddy over new babies in the family, here them mention about how they want grandchildren or great-grandchildren and you feel ashamed of your body, broken...like a failure. You start a new job, just when people started somewhat understand at your old job now you have to re-explain yourself...no one really gets it; no one!! It comes a point when people ask you if you have kids and instead of going into the whole spill you just say 'not yet'...when they rudely ask why, you reply 'just not ready' or 'just not time'...when deep down in your heart your screaming and crying...

In a world of infertility one can feel alone, but thanks to this silly little blog y'all have made me realize I'm far from alone, THANK YOU! Your support means the world to me!

6 comments:

Kristin said...

I love blogging for that reason too. It is so nice if you need prayer or just someone to listen, there are all these people just right there. Most people don't understand blogging, but I truly feel like I really know everyone I've met on here. I'm so glad that we met on this blog!

Melody said...

You are never alone. I can only speak for myself but I'm sure all the rest of your blog readers feel the same way. We all want a baby for you! I pray for you all the time and hope that it happens very very soon!

Rosie said...

Just remember doll, that even outside of this blog, you still have me. Someone who really does understand. Love ya!

sunnyside up said...

Oh, how I relate to the "just not ready" and the "just not time". We moved from the states to be back around my husband’s family in another country and all we hear about is "well you're married now, when do the babies come? We are praying for you, anytime now, you can get pregnant. You're married now."
OMG! I just want to scream! And then my husband's cousin's wife is a DISASTER but for some reason she can reproduce like a rabbit. And it breaks my heart. TRULY!
I am thankful that my husband gets me and understands me. But it's hard when you are new to an area and EVERYONE has babies or are pregnant with their first, second or third one. All of my friends are back in the states and I haven't shared with them anything, I feel so disconnected. Disconnected with them and my own family.
Infertility SUCKS monkey toes! :(

I totally understand all of your emotions and I, personally, think it's all normal. Infertility is a lonely road to travel. And no matter how many of us go thru it, it's still pretty lonely.

You'll be in my thoughts!

hugs!
Mrs. Sunnyside up

www.roadtoreproduction.blogspot.com

Tiffany said...

Blogging SAVED me, and I am NOT lieing. There is NO way I would have made it through THREE IVFs without my fellow bloggers. No way I could have kept pushing forward without my online family. It sounds corny, but they got me here. People with NEVER understand until they have gone through it, they will never know the way your heart aches or the shame you feel, the feeling of wanting to isolate yourself. We are honored to be here for you, we were all dealt this crappy hand for one reason or another and I PROMISE you that in the end it IS worth it, in the end it DOES make you stronger. In the end somehow you WILL be a Mommy and we are blessed to be here cheering for you pushing you forward, supporting you, and giving you tips on how to ride this crazy rollercoaster.

Joey said...

Tiffany-

I feel your pain!

I've found this blog helpful too.

www.thechildlessmom.blogspot.com

Looking forward to reading more of your posts.

Joey


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