- Please give us some background about yourself: What is your age, what do you do
My name is Tiffany Pifer, I just turned 29. My husband and I married May of 2006-he is my best friend. I work as an office manager at a local company in our town and my husband is a customer service manager at an environmental company. We tried for 7 years to get pregnant, several treatments...one pregnancy ending in a loss and now I'm 29 weeks pregnant with our Son.
- Realizing that everything is not ok: When did you realize that you were having trouble conceiving? How did you feel about it? Did you share this with your family or friends? How did they react?
Well, our story is a bit different. March of 2006 (2 months before we got married) I went in for a normal pap smear. It came back abnormal. Long story short, I had severe dysplaysia, which was on the verge of being border line cancer cells. My doctor told me right then that getting pregnant would be hard. Zach and I talked alot about everything. We knew kids (in the future) is something we wanted. We weren't prepared to have them at this time so early in our marriage, but with that said we didn't want to look back years down the road and wonder 'what if we would have tried'...we didn't want to miss our window of opportunity. So I got off of birth control and we immediately used the method of 'not protecting'...the way we looked at it was yea this wasn't our plan to have children so soon...but maybe it was God's plan. We were very open with our family in the beginning...we didn't quite know the severity of things at this moment...Our friends and family from the beginning were very supportive.
- Overcoming the problem: What have you done to improve your chances of getting pregnant? Did you follow a particular treatment?
Over the years we realized it wouldn't be 'so easy' We tried naturally for a year, we did several rounds of clomid and femera which is a pill that helps ovulation. We found out my tubes were blocked and I underwent surgery to unblock them....we finally went to a fertility clinic...had 3 IUI's; none took. We have done 2 IVF'S and one FET (frozen egg transfer)....
- The results: Have you been able to get pregnant? How long did it take? Did you experience any side effects of the treatment?
We got pregnant on my 2nd IVF....we were over the moon excited. After 6 years of trying we were finally pregnant. Sadly it ended in a miscarriage. We jumped right back into a frozen embryo cycle and one of our little babies took...we are now 29 weeks pregnant with our son. I had many side effects from treatments...everyone you could possibly think about. Moody, hot flashes, emotional, gained weight, lost weight....you name it I had it!!
- The "Now": How do you feel after getting pregnant? How do people react (if you shared your troubles with your loved ones)?
I feel so blessed. It still feels so surreal...we are so used to 'NOT' getting pregnant it took us a long time to except we were finally pregnant...and after losing our first baby we didn't get emotionally attached to this baby for quite some time. You stay guarded in fear that something bad will happen...you don't want another broken heart. People are beyond supportive. We have received so much love and support from family, friends and complete strangers. We are truly blessed. We never knew why God had us wait so long for this miracle, but it just makes sense now...I can't wait to see his beautiful face and hold him. He is truly a blessing from above.
- Advice for others: What should others trying to get pregnant do? And do's and dont's?
Relax (I know easier said than done AND this is the DREADED ONE WORD NO INFERTILE WANTS TO HEAR)...we thankfully were blessed with patience and faith along this bumpy path. Throughout all the heartache I never lost faith in God and his plan for us. Hang onto hope, don't ever give up. I know so many are leery of modern day medicine and infertility treatments...it took us along time to go down that path, not to mention it's pricey. But it's so worth it. The doctors are so intelligent and most of them truly care about you and your desires to be a mother. Have faith...never be afraid to ask to many questions. Find a support group on line, you would be amazed at how many out there are going through the same thing as you. Your fertile friends will say things at times that hurt, they are just trying to be a friend...it does hurt at times, but please know they only mean well...if anyone is putting you down or making you feel stressed let those friends go. You need positive friends and family in your lifes during these moments...people who will always lift you up when you are weak. Don't' focus on the whole staircase, just climb one step at a time and don't forget to have fun. Trying to have a baby doesn't have to be all 'work'...it's important to not forget your partner. NO BLAMING. God choose y'all for a reason. He see's something amazing in you to be able to go down such a difficult path. I know it doesn't seem like rainbows and butterfly's, but the strength that you get out of this journey and the person it molds you into are worth every step.