Thursday, July 24, 2008

Dear God

Dear God,

Every month, I obsess over my symptoms. I search the internet for gifts to give our parents when we share with them the news. I look for songs that would go well as a soundrack to a video that ends with "We're pregnant.." and a little photo of the first ultrasound. I think of ways to tell my husband. I decorate a nursery in my head. I search for fabrics, cribs, and for understanding.

I wait two weeks for nothing. I wait two weeks only to begin again. I wait two weeks for disappointment. I wait two weeks to turn to You and ask You "Why? Why, God, why?" From here on out, I promise I am taking You on this journey with me. I am not going to wait until I fall apart or "need you". I need You now and always. And so I'm asking for Your help.

Heavenly Father, I pray in my heart of hearts to create a little one in Your image. I pray for forgiveness and strength-and for the ability to get through the times when we fail. I pray for Your plan, and that You will do things in YOUR time, and NOT mine...as hard as that is sometimes. I pray for the willingness to accept what I am dealt, and to be thankful for the things I have been given, that so often I do not deserve. Lord, let this be a time of learning and a time of thankfulness. For I was born a woman, with my own gifts and characteristics that no one can match or re-create. Bless me on this journey. And bless those that struggle with me.

AMEN

All my love and devotion,

Tiffany
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4 comments:

Ape and Brett said...

okay so i am crying right now... that is so sweet tiff!! Im always here for you babe!! We love you

Melody said...

That is beautiful! And, with all of us praying with and for you, I know it will happen!

The McCrary's said...

that's a really pretty way to put it all! i really do feel you'll get your beautiful family addition because you deserve it!!

Melody said...

Hey Tiff,
I haven't talked to you in a while. How's the "break" going? How are you feeling, anything exciting happen yet?
Love ya!
MELODY


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